Funny poll questions for work

A funny poll question for work is one everyone can answer in two seconds, where every option is a little absurd and none of them is wrong. Below are 40 of them, grouped by type, and the /poll text to post them in Slack with Simple Poll.

The best ones are multiple choice with three or four options. They get more votes than open questions, and the split in the results is the joke.

When to use it
When a channel needs a laugh, a meeting needs a warm-up, or you want a light weekly poll that people answer without being asked twice.
How often
Weekly
Category
Social and culture

Example polls

Paste any of these into the message box in Slack.

/poll "Which office supply would win in a fight?" "Stapler" :paperclip: "Hole punch" :o: "Tape dispenser" :scissors: "The broken printer" :printer: limit 1

Choice poll. Multiple choice with emoji, one vote each so there is a winner (Premium for the vote limit).

/poll "Which office supply would win in a fight?" "Stapler" :paperclip: "Hole punch" :o: "Tape dispenser" :scissors: "The broken printer" :printer: limit 1

Premium: vote limits

Limit votes: 1 per person

/poll "If the team were a sandwich, which part would you be?" "The bread, holding it together" "The filling, doing the real work" "The pickle, controversial" "The crumbs, here for the vibes"

Choice poll. Absurd options and no wrong answer. Free.

/poll "If the team were a sandwich, which part would you be?" "The bread, holding it together" "The filling, doing the real work" "The pickle, controversial" "The crumbs, here for the vibes"

Free

/poll "What would your out-of-office message say if it had to be honest?" short text :joy:

Short text with voting. An open question. People react to the answers that made them laugh.

/poll "What would your out-of-office message say if it had to be honest?" short text :joy:

Free

/poll "You can delete one recurring meeting forever. Which one?" allow-options

Choice poll. No options at all. Everyone adds their own and votes on the others.

/poll "You can delete one recurring meeting forever. Which one?" allow-options

Free

Allow options

Multiple-choice questions

  • Which office supply would win in a fight: stapler, hole punch or tape dispenser?
  • What is the correct number of browser tabs to have open: under 10, 10 to 30, or I have stopped counting?
  • If the team were a sandwich, which part would you be?
  • Which meeting phrase should be retired first: "circle back", "take this offline" or "quick sync"?
  • What is your reply-all tolerance: zero, one, or I live for it?
  • Best way to end a video call: wave, "bye everyone" or just leave?
  • Which animal would be the best manager: owl, golden retriever, octopus or cat?
  • What is the ideal meeting length: 15 minutes, 25 minutes or "this could have been a message"?
  • How do you name your files: final, final_v2, final_ACTUAL?
  • Which kitchen crime is worst: empty coffee pot, fish in the microwave or the mystery container?
  • If your job had a theme song, which genre would it be?
  • What is your emoji reaction of choice when you have nothing to add?

Would you rather and hypotheticals

  • Would you rather have a desk that tidies itself or an inbox that answers itself?
  • Would you rather only speak in GIFs or only in emoji for a week?
  • If you could add one item to the office for free, what would it be?
  • You can delete one recurring meeting forever. Which one?
  • You have to rename the company after a snack. Which snack?
  • Which superpower would help most at work: mind reading, teleporting or a pause button?
  • Would you rather present to the whole company or write the quarterly report?
  • You are given a team mascot. What animal is it?

More in would you rather questions for work.

Questions about habits

  • How many times did you hit snooze this morning?
  • Camera on or camera off before 10am?
  • What is on your desk right now that should not be?
  • What is the most-used app on your phone that is not for work?
  • How many unread messages are you comfortable living with?
  • What time does your brain actually start working?
  • Lunch at your desk, or lunch anywhere but your desk?
  • What is your go-to excuse for being late to a meeting?
  • Pen and paper, or notes app?
  • Which day of the week feels the longest?

Open questions for the thread

  • What is the strangest job you have ever had?
  • Describe your week using only a movie title.
  • What is the most useless talent you have?
  • What would your out-of-office message say if it had to be honest?
  • Which song gets you through a long afternoon?
  • What is a small hill you will die on?
  • What is the best thing you have seen on someone's video background?
  • What is the worst advice you have ever been given?
  • What would be on the menu at a restaurant run by this team?
  • If you wrote a book about your job, what would the title be?

Post these as a short text poll with a reaction, so people can vote for the answers that made them laugh. Add order-results-by-votes and the best ones rise to the top.

Keep it funny for everyone

The joke should be about the situation, never a person or a group. Skip anything about age, looks, money, drinking, religion or politics, and anything that makes someone admit a weakness in front of their manager. If you would not ask it in an all-hands, do not post it.

Keep votes named. Half the fun is seeing who picked the octopus, and named votes keep people from trolling. Post at the same time each week, for example Friday after lunch, and let the person with the funniest answer pick next week's question.

Questions

What makes a poll question funny?

A normal workplace situation with options that are slightly too honest. "Which meeting phrase should be retired first?" works because everyone has heard all three.

Should funny polls be anonymous?

Usually not. Named votes are part of the fun, and people talk about their picks in the thread. Use anonymous only when a question asks people to admit something.

How often should I post one?

Once a week in a work channel. Daily works in a social channel like #random. For a daily habit, see the question of the day template.

Do these polls need a paid plan?

No. Polls with up to 5 options, emoji, allow-options and short text are free. One vote per person (limit 1) is Premium.

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